48. Have A Nice Day.

Prince Charles is actually a very nice man, though his ears could be used as satalite dishes.

I am your average Englishman. I like my beer, love my football, pick faults with everything and think I have all the answers. My teeth are bad, but that’s just me. I think Americans have worse teeth than the Brits.  I love tradition, hate change, and can be grouchy at the flick of a switch.

I grew up on a steady stream of American TV shows which led me to believe that all American Cops drove fancy cars or were deformed in some way. I also believed that you could park anywhere and leave your car unlocked when doing so. What a great country.

All American homeless people have a sence of humour and can do voice overs for commercials.

The average American makes fun of the British way of life, the average Brit makes fun of the American way of life. I think it is now a tradition hailing back to when some loonies got a hissy fit on and chucked a load of tea in the water. As all Brits know, the water needs to be boiling to make a good cup of tea.

When someone laughs at me and mentions something about the U.S. revolution I always reply, “You didn’t win that war, we gave up. We decided to go to Australia as it has better beach front property.”

One of the things the Brits always find funny is that the Americans always say “Have a nice day.”  Why do we find it funny? I think it is because the Brits would never wish anyone to “have a nice day.” We are more likely to mutter under our breath something along the lines of go forth and multiply. I’m trying hard to put my finger on it, but I think it is because Brits want to get from A to B without being bothered by other human beings. And if someone said “have a nice day” to them then it would probably be taken as sarcasm and treated with the contempt that it deserves.

Put the damn (trolly) cart where it's supposed to go!

Now living here in the States for ten years I have been told to “Have a nice day,” almost everyday since I’ve been here. When I first got here I found it annoying. I am English, and English people do not have nice days!  But after a while it seemed to me that these people saying “have a nice day,” may actually mean it. Perhaps I could have a nice day? Maybe if this being nice multiplied and everyone was nice to each other.  The whole world could be a happy and joyful place and…….hang on, I’m English.  The nice buck stops here. You can tell me to “have a nice day,” but as soon as I leave I’m going to moan about shopping carts, red lights, coffee being not made right. It’s not going to be a nice day. It will be an O.K. day. A fair to average day. Nice would mean I have to be happy. And that only happens during soccer or when I get some peace and quiet!

Have a good one!

But wait! I tried, honest I did. I tried to be all American like and wish people to “have a nice day.” but it just didn’t sit right. I felt weird. Just like the Grinch when his heart started to beat. So I changed my approach. I tell everyone to “Have a good one.” I like it a lot more. It appeals to the survivalist in me. Surviving the day. Yeah your day could be nice, but it’s really good if nothing bad happens.

Perhaps I just read too much into these things? Well that’s what I do, waste time over thinking things!

Oh, Have a good one!

I saw this and it fits me, I just didn't know when I would ever get to use it in a post so here it is!

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About davebakersoccer

I am a person who has always had too much time on their hands, and instead of creating a masterpiece or taking on the world, I have spent my time on nothing important at all.
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6 Responses to 48. Have A Nice Day.

  1. kenberry475 says:

    As usual..reading your blog cracks me up! Oh by the way…it isn’t just you. Every time I say “Have a nice day” it only comes out in my very best Forrest Gump voice..I can’t help it!

  2. Kenn says:

    After a miserable week, I’m catching up on blog reading.. and this particular entry made me laugh so hard I thought I was going to wet myself. Okay.. perhaps not REALLY… but it was just the ticket I needed to laugh. One day, I just want to walk with you through the day and see the world through your eyes.. or through the mutterings under your breath.

  3. Kenn I think it would be a great idea to meet up some time, and I’m really a pleasant guy, honest. Even though the wife says I’m a grumpy git!

  4. sothislife says:

    Love your post, this one had me laughing. But Brits do have worse teeth..lol. Loved the teas part. Luanna

  5. Ruby says:

    Dave, you’re right about us being grumpy gits. What bewilders me most about the US is the level of enthusiasm so often greeted with. Being wished a nice day is tolerable as you can get away with slinking off without much of a reply (person probably thinks grumpy git and they’d be right) but when your whole family is faced with a grinning, enthusing person asking “So how are we all today?” I have no idea how to respond. Any attempt to reply in the same tone would come off as sarcasm. And besides, it should be obvious we’re all bloody miserable by the looks on our faces! 😉

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